Divorces are often difficult, even under the best of circumstances. When you are divorcing a narcissist, things can get even more complicated. You have to make a plan before you venture into any proceedings so that you are a bit better prepared.
One thing that you should do is to decide what is worth fighting over and what you should just leave alone. The last thing you need to do is to have your entire divorce held up because of an issue that really won't matter in the long run. Not only will holding up the divorce cost you time, it can also cost you money.
When you go into negotiations, you should make sure that you don't have any unrealistic expectations. You have to be willing to negotiate. You know your ex and your ex knows you. The narcissistic tendencies in these cases are to do whatever possible to get to you. By dropping expectations, you lessen the likelihood that this will occur.
This doesn't mean that you have to completely give up on getting the things you want. Essentially, you need to just figure out how you can make things work out in your favor. This means beating your ex at his or her own game.
One way that you can maximize your efforts is to remain firm and flexible but unshakable. This enables you to keep your focus on what is truly important so you can overlook the instances in which your ex tries to manipulate you or starts to pitch fits while you are trying to work things out.
Source: The Huffington Post, "The Secret to Divorcing a Narcissist: ‘Stop Feeling, Start Thinking'," Lindsey Ellison, accessed March 17, 2017