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5 ways to improve your life and finances after divorce

Divorce is hard on your finances. You have to try to make decisions during this process that will help your financial state. Some of these will have to do with the end of your marriage, but others have to do with your new single life. Thinking about how you can make everything work together can be beneficial.

There are a few ways that you can make this happen. Consider these tips:

  • Keep your emotions and financial matters confidential. Oversharing can make it difficult for you to make sound decisions because you will have to deal with a bunch of unwanted advice.
  • Take stock of your finances. You need to know what your money situation is during the divorce. You have to live on your own income, so set your budget so you know what you need to do.
  • Make sure you close joint accounts. There is no sense in you being liable for debts that your ex is racks up on a joint account after the divorce. It might mean having to sacrifice a bit, but don't leave these accounts open for new charges.
  • Set up your own financial success. Open your own checking account and get a copy of your credit report. This sets you up for handling your own finances during your single life.
  • Plan for your goals. This might mean that you need to boost your savings so you can meet your goals. Write out a plan that will help you see your goals come to fruition. Make mini goals that are easy to attain so you can have motivation throughout the process. Set additional larger goals that keep you on track for the long term.

Take support orders seriously in your divorce

When you are going through a divorce, the topic of support payments might come up. There are two types of these payments that you have to think about – spousal and child. These serve different purposes, but there is a chance that you will have to pay for both of them. We know that this might not sound like something you want to do, but you have to be prepared to handle these support matters if the court orders to do so.

You can't think of spousal support and child support in the same manner. The spousal support is meant to help support your ex for a specific amount of time. The child support is paid to your ex, but it is meant to be used on the expenses related to the children. It can be hard to think about having to hand all of this over to your ex, but remember that you must follow court orders.

Navigating the shoals: Divorce and social media

People today are so hooked on social media that — quite ironically — on the social media site YouTube, there are dozens of video compilations of people so engrossed in their smartphones that they step into traffic, walk into poles, etc.

But if you are going through a divorce, no matter how much a part of your former life daily Instagram shots and Facebook status updates were, restrain yourself now. Your digital footprint can wind up having a major impact on the outcome of any pending divorce and custody litigation.

Take time for yourself after the end of your marriage

Some people who are going through a divorce soon find that they don't want to be alone. They might try to rush into a new relationship, but this can't happen too fast or you might make mistakes. The last thing you need after the end of a marriage is to land in another wrong relationship that makes you miserable.

It is a good idea to learn how to be comfortable as a single person so that you aren't getting into a relationship just so you have someone else there. Another reason to hold off on starting a new relationship is that you can focus on getting the divorce finalized without adding in another person.

Find ways to make a parenting plan work for your children

Coming up with the terms of a parenting plan isn't always easy. There might be some bad feeling between you and your ex because of the divorce. Even though the marriage didn't work out, you should think about how your ex is as a parent. You might realize that they do have your child's best interests at heart, which can help you to view them in a more positive light for the custody arrangement.

Once the parenting plan is set, you have the basic outline for the custody order. You should be prepared for times when things have to change a bit. When both parents remain flexible, the children can reap great benefits. Just remember that this has to be mutual. You can't be expected to give in all the time while your ex never makes any concessions.

Holiday celebrations may span both homes for your children

Christmas is just a few days away. For most people, this means having family time. Children who have divorced parents are probably looking forward to the holiday, but they might also have a bit of concern about how things will go. As a parent, you likely want your children to have good memories of the holidays during their childhood. The good news here is your attitude during this time of the year can have a profound impact on how your children view the celebrations.

One way that you can help them this holiday season is to allow the holiday celebration to span both homes. Your children are going to be excited about the gifts they get, the people they get to see and the experiences they have. You shouldn't expect them to curtail that excitement when they are with you just because those things happened with your ex.

Think about who you vent to at the end of your marriage

Many things happen when you go through a divorce. You might feel such strong emotions and have various things that you need to get off your chest. When this happens, you need to think carefully about who you are going to vent to.

There is a good chance that you and your ex share many of the same friends. This works well when you are married, but you have to determine if you can trust any of them when you need to talk about the end of your marriage. The last thing that you need it is to have one of them go back and tell your ex everything you are saying.

Prepare for your child custody hearings

Going to court for a child custody matter can be nerve-wracking. You are probably worried about the outcome and might be very anxious. There are several things you can do when you are working to prepare for these hearings. These can help you ensure that you are putting your best foot forward from the start of the case.

One of the best things that you can do before a hearing is to find out what the laws state. You need to know how to apply these to your case so that you don't have unrealistic expectations about what is going to happen. Your stress level might decrease when you find out this information.

Tips for helping your children through your divorce

While your divorce may be causing you to feel overwhelmed and distracted, your children need you now more than ever.

But, it can be difficult to know how to show up in the right way for your kids after your breakup. Here's what you can do to assist your children through your "decoupling" process.

Unmarried couples face challenges when splitting up

When you live with your boyfriend or girlfriend, you will probably amass assets and debts as a couple. Have you thought about what is going to happen to those if you break up? The fact here is that it can be very contentious to work through who is going to get what if your relationship ends. We are here to help you work through the process of dividing everything and making sure you aren't getting taken advantage of during the split. While you don't have to go through a divorce, the logistics of ending a live-in relationship can be challenging.

Before you start to evaluate what you think needs to happen, you should get an accurate account of what needs to be split. Think beyond just the larger assets. If you bought living room furniture together, you have to decide who keeps it. Ideally, each person will walk away with the things they brought into the relationship. For example, if you've been using your boyfriend's bed in the apartment you share, he will probably take that with him if he leaves.

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Visalia, CA 93291

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