One of the most traumatic things that can happen to children is learning that their parents are going to get a divorce. At that point, it is up to the parents to determine how they can make the transition easier on the child and what they can do to provide the stability and consistency that the children need.
Many parents just assume that their children will be fine during and after the divorce. This might not be the case. There is a chance that the children are just putting on a brave face to try to cope with the divorce. This can be a real problem because it might not give you the chance to try to rectify issues before they become too big.
Interestingly, some of the issues that children will face start long before the divorce papers are filed. For many children, the challenging times start when the parents' relationship starts to deteriorate. At that point, there are going to be some changes with how the parents interact with each other and with the children. This might be the most difficult challenge that the children face.
Once the divorce papers are filed, it might become easier for the children to adjust. Things can finally settle down into the two homes. Rules can be set and the children can begin to understand what is expected and what might happen.
Getting to that point might be difficult for the adults because of all the legal factors that must be considered. Finalizing the terms of the child custody case quickly might be in the child's best interests so that this part of life will be stabilized quickly.
Source: Merck Manuals, "Divorce and Children," Steven D. Blatt, MD, accessed March 30, 2018